Can you believe it “all y’all” yep, I’m showin’ owff mah Texan learned from Tipple-the-First - it’s only 10 weeks to the day till the early starters begin congregating at the Renaissance Capital View for Double-TIPPLE.
Well it is and here’s another phrase I learned from iahflyr - “Ah stepped in a poody“ - I think it means I’m wearing remarkably fashionable footwear...
So to get you all in the mood and to ensure you’re all TIPPLEishously knowledgeable here’s a TIPPLE QUIZ. One point for each correct answer. Teachers pet gets a gold star in the form of a correct mark and a beer at DoubleTIPPLE or wherever in England they meet me (enticing brianandlin, normanp, trevfour and any other Brits to have a go)
1. Let’s start off gently - Where was Tipple-the-first held?
B. Boston (the original one in England - who’s for the Premier Inn?)
C. Nunavut (no searching on Google to find out if it’s a real place)
D. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch (yep it is a real place, wrong but real, see I said I’d start gentle)
A. The Inimitable Personages of Principled Licentious Elegance (who says porn can’t be art?)
B. Tripe, Intestines, Piles, Paws and Lung Eaters (Tasty!)
C. The Insiders Pickles, Pies, and Lagavulin Ensemble (we eat, drink and vomit in harmony - we have lots of vacant dates, seriously lots)
D. The Insiders Points Pints and Liquor Extravaganza
3. Name the founding fathers of TIPPLE (Wow, sounds good, hope its me)
A. brightlybob and some other guy
B. brightlybob and some other gal
Double marks to all that select D. I’m a lawyer, the truth means nothing!
4. Who, or What is TIPPLE-the-First?
A. King of England 1672-1701
B. Earliest ever gathering of the Campaign for Real Ale (CAMRA) in 3240BC not recorded in history as we got too pissed leaving it to the Germans to actually write all the boring purity stuff down several millennia later
C. Tom, the World champion Nipple eater (6 pig nipples in 10 mins - chewy)
D. First ever organised large-scale Marriott Insiders gathering.
5. Who is this?
A. Winner of most likely Insider personage to repeat everything he’s forgotten quadruply, or more (yeah, yeah, I know, I’m your future, blah blah)
B. jere5iah (what can I say, it’s pick on a newb day!)
C. A slug in a wig
D. erc readying to battle the Marriott matrix
Clue: either A or D would be correct , but C gets double marks.
6. Who missed the midnight taco run at TIPPLE-the-first?
A. iahflyr, drunk as a skunk he was!
B. Me, I remember nothing!
C. seatexan, got chatted up by Rupert the Bear and eloped to NutsWood
D. pluto77, got chatted up by the tram driver and eloped to the terminus
7. jsucool76 was late arriving to pre-tipple at TIPPLE-the-First because
A. brightlybob laid nails on the runway
B. United are so cr4p
C. American are so cr4p
D. Delta are so cr4p
Clue, even I don’t know the answer to this one, I remember nothing. Ok terrible clue, but I can’t do better as I don’t know. NB - answer A also is acceptable for Westjet, Allegiant, Alaska, JetBlue, Southwest and Spirit (as if!)
8. Tipple-The-First was held at which brand of Hotel?
A. Ritz, and we all got second mortgages to stay there, except nationwide who sold a kidney
B. J W Marriott. Jealous are you? Yeah, as well you should be
C. Hilton. We like pain!
D. Motel6 - where the cardboard elites get a lightbulb for their room and twig elites get the electricity turned on to use it.
9. Which TIPPLE-ocious celebrity will be presenting both “Chase the credit card bonus” and “Millennial hotel furnishing” at double TIPPLE?
B. starguy - or is he presenting “SPG, Use it and lose it” or how to do TIPPLE and SPG simultaneously
C. ssindc - or is he presenting “how not to anonymise your hometown in your username”
D. jsucool76 - or is he presenting “how to make it to TIPPLE despite BrightlyBob”
10. When will DoubleTIPPLE take place?
A. April 26
B. April 27
C. April 28
D. April 29
Answer here is all of them, so the real question is which date do you stand a fighting chance of drinking the Renaissance dry on Marriott corporates dime?
Ok folks, answers below. You know how it goes, my judgment is final and never ever fair - yeah, what can I say, I passed the Judges Exam but failed the interview. So as the judge-by-self-appointment here I don’t need to be even remotely fair... But apart from a correct answer participation point (ooooh, you can start catching up with uatraveler1k) there’s also a free beer at DoubleTIPPLE.
Good Luck, you’ll all need it!